Denial has been a way of life for me for many years. I actually believe in denial.
Whenever I get married, I start buying Gourmet magazine.
The desire to get married, which - I regret to say, I believe is basic and primal in women - is followed almost immediately by an equally basic and primal urge - which is to be single again.
My mother was a good recreational cook, but what she basically believed about cooking was that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you.
When you slip on a banana peel, people laugh at you; but when you tell people you slipped on a banana peel, it's your laugh. So you become the hero rather than the victim of the joke.
With any child entering adolescence, one hunts for signs of health, is desperate for the smallest indication that the child's problems will never be important enough for a television movie.
I don't care who you are. When you sit down to write the first page of your screenplay, in your head, you're also writing your Oscar acceptance speech.
Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy.
What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you.
When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
I am continually fascinated at the difficulty intelligent people have in distinguishing what is controversial from what is merely offensive.
In my sex fantasy, nobody ever loves me for my mind.
My mother wanted us to understand that the tragedies of your life one day have the potential to be comic stories the next.
I try to write parts for women that are as complicated and interesting as women actually are.
Beware of men who cry. It's true that men who cry are sensitive to and in touch with feelings, but the only feelings they tend to be sensitive to and in touch with are their own.
If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters.
As far as the men who are running for president are concerned, they aren't even people I would date.
Death is a sniper. It strikes people you love, people you like, people you know - it's everywhere. You could be next. But then you turn out not to be. But then again, you could be.
Summer bachelors, like summer breezes, are never as cool as they pretend to be.
The realization that I may have only a few good years remaining has hit me with real force, and I have done a lot of thinking as a result. I would like to have come up with something profound, but I haven't.
What will happen to sex after liberation? Frankly, I don't know. It is a great mystery to all of us.
E-mail is a whole new way of being friends with people: intimate but not, chatty but not, communicative but not; in short, friends but not. What a breakthrough. How did we ever live without it? I have more to say on this subject, but I have to answer an instant message from someone I almost know.
I was always proud of being tough-minded, and I think I still am, but in my old age I've got a little softer in the head, and that's all right.
I survived turning 60, I was not thrilled to turn 61, I was less thrilled to turn 62, I didn't much like being 63, I loathed being 64, and I will hate being 65. I don't let on about such things in person; in person, I am cheerful and Pollyanna-ish. But the honest truth is that it's sad to be over 60.
I just want to go on making movies, and some of them will be completely meaningless, except, of course, to me.
When we were working on 'Julie & Julia,' I went back to the Julia Child cookbook and made some things I haven't made in a while, one being beef bourguignon, which to me is a hilariously 1960s dish that everyone felt they had to serve at a dinner party or they weren't a grown-up.
Every 10 years or so, there was a moment when I'd say, even subconsciously, 'Is that all there is?' You've got to find ways to keep it fresh for yourself.
Nothing like mashed potatoes when you're feeling blue. Nothing like getting into bed with a bowl of hot mashed potatoes already loaded with butter, and methodically adding a thin, cold slice of butter to every forkful.
Everyone loves fried chicken, Don't ever make it. Ever. Buy it from a place that makes good fried chicken.